Soccer is my life!!!!

Today, I'm here to extol the virtues of the game. I love soccer. Especially when played with a small plasticky yellow ball. It's a special ball. It has a hole somewhere for me to hang on to. I have another spongy one. That's a freebie from HBO I think (Well, it says HBO. Has to be!). The plasticky one is better cos it irritates people more! It makes a lot of noise.

Oh yes, I was about to extol the virtues of soccer. Reason Number One. The ALL IMPORTANT reason: It helps me to poo. It's true. You know how getting stucked is not very fun? Well, I can't help it sometimes. And it's crap when they tell you to eat more veggies. I eat LOADS of veggies everyday (trust me, it's glam), but sometimes, I still have stucked days. So all I need is a round of soccer and it'll be out. Exercise is the way to go (not quite, just some short soccer game). After that, my mood turns better, the day gets brighter, the weather less hot, the lizards all gone!

Reason Number Two: It makes the entire family exercise. Everyone has their turn at picking the ball when it gets stuck under some stupid cabinet or something. Then again, there are lazier members in the family who refuse to go pick it up, or pretend not to understand me. I know it, they ARE pretending!!! Just this morning, I managed to give my sis a bit of grief. Just when she was about to step out of the house, I 'ordered' her to pick up the ball from under the cabinet. I gave her this, 'c'mon, help me!' look, opened my eyes real wide and beamed at her rather foolishly. Humans are just like that. You have to look stupid before they'll do anything for you. If you snarl at them, they'll give you a smack on the head! She had no choice but to go and get it.

Reason Number Three: The harder the exercise, the better you sleep. Taking into consideration the number of hours I sleep in the day, exercise IS important.

Reason Number Four: That's the only form of exercise I'll ever get! No one wants to bring my ANYWHERE! Hear that, SPCA?!

*sobsob*

*wink*