When the going gets tough, the tough goes to sleep

Yes, that's true. The going does get tough for a wee dog like me. Certain things do get me down. Like, when I wanna play some soccer, the ball gets stuck somewhere I can't get at. That sucks. If mummy's at home, I'll get mummy to get it for me. But when she's busy or something, damn. That sucks big time. Then, the going starts getting tough. It's just like an itch you can't get at. It's just like the hamster that you can't chomp on. It's just like trying to get at a lizard on the wall. It peeves the hell out of me.

By now, most people would have realised that I can be a rather grouchy and irritable fella. Well, you can't expect the Prince of YP to be anything less than that, can you?

Anyway, when the going gets a wee bit too tough, I go take a nap. Trust me, things become brighter when you wake up. By then, the skies have cleared, the bladdy birds have stopped chirping and dinner is served.

*Yawn....*

It's monday. Black monday. Even though I'm grounded every single day, I still hate mondays. No no no, nothing to do with that fat and silly orange cat. Orange is such an unglam color to be caught in. Phew, my ancestors are all white! Even ipods are white these days. White is THE color. Back to mondays. Mondays are such tiring tiring days. After a fun weekend, monday is just pure boredom. Nothing to do at all. Nobody's home. Sometimes, mummy's home. That's bad. I spend my time watching her zoom around the house with wet clothes, then dry clothes then putting the clothes on some kinda board and she just stands there. Humans do weird things. So I watch.

Am waiting for the sister to come home. When she's home, there's air con. It's a hot hot day ya know! Took a little nap just now. Nothing to do. Walk around the house, keep a lookout for stupid birds and bees and flies and insects and lizards. Boy, do I hate those things. They are ugly or what!

I wonder when will they bring me out again. Oh yes, that day I went for a bbq. Was not fun. I was latched to this railing and abandoned at a corner. Damn, I forgot to bring my mobile then. Otherwise I'd have called for help! And there was nothing there for me to eat. To think mummy even brought my own food to a bbq! See, mums are embarassing sometimes!

Anyway, I have mixed feelings about going out on this thing they call 'kai kai'. It makes me really furious to see the state of things out there. Other dogs are so terrible, they have no manners at all! They are terrible, terrible, terrible. They need to learn some ettiquette! Not that I'm mister ettiquette myself... But still...

Okok, enough on that. I think I better get back to my nap. Otherwise, mummy will wake me up for dinner soon. My whole day will be messed up once again!

Adios, scooting off now..... Ooops, please don't tell anyone that I 'scooted' off, they'll send me to that strange looking vet again!

I wanna be a punk rocker!

I woke up a bit earlier than usual today. After the pee (it's tough to hold it in all night!), I decided that today shall be punk rock day. So, the first thing a punk rocker needs, is the FUR! The FUR has gotta look right! So there I was, trying very hard, using all my paws, my entire head, the floor, basically anything and everything to get the look right.

For all the young punks out there who need to get the look right, do this. Use your 2 paws (both left and right, front ones of course!) brush fur from back of ear to front. VIGOROUSLY. That settles the spikes at the top of the head. Next, the sides. While doing this, please make sure that you are not destroying the upward spikes. Put your head to the ground, one side at the time, rub vigorously. That should settle the sides. For a angsty messed up look in the face, use your paws and rub your face real hard. That's all you need to do! Groovy!

Ok, let me get on with my grouse number 1 of the day. The moment my sister woke up and went to pee (I followed her, as usual, to make sure that she doesn't mess up my ROOM!), she screeched, why do you look so messy like a stray?!?

Damn, is she dumb or what?! PUNK ROCK! DUH. Then she proceeded to flatten my fur ALL OVER! Hey, that took time. It's a work of art. (But at least she didn't use the brush! Phew! That's public enemy number 1) Anyway, that's that. So I'm back to looking a wee bit daft (Ref to photo 1: That's me.)

Humans, you just don't geddit ya?!

Bliss...

Well, this is the way my life works. Basically, I wake up when the sister has got to wake up for work. On ocassions when she skives, I can sleep in. Good! Oh, did I mention that I can sleep in with air conditioning? That has got to do with fur, nothing with comfort or luxury. Humans just don't get it. Look at me!! Look at the volume of fur I have!! C'mon, it's just like wearing a fur coat in the tropics! Go try it! But I don't fancy getting shaved either. The look just doesn't do for me.

Just woke up after another short nap. *yawn* It's tiring to be sleeping most of the day ya know! Wondering when will mummy serve lunch. Oh yes, talking about mummy. Well, I'll blog that later on. It's tough to type with your paws! Hmmm... Just liken it to.... hmmmm... glueing 2 fingers together and then glue FUR all around it and start typing!

Now, to start hunting for lunch. If I can't find lunch, I'll make another attempt at that tasty little morsel of meat they called a hamster or something. It's brownish, looks yummy....

This is me

DSC00479_1
Originally uploaded by wooferswoof.

Ya, I know I look a little daft in this picture, but that's me, a little dookie at times....

Why??

Why?!?! Why must I have a heading for every post?? Yikes! How can I think of so many headings? Nevermind, as my close relative Yoda will say, may the force be with you. Haha. Yes, lame. But I think I got that from my sister.

Right now, I'm mildly peeved and sprawled on her bed. I don't understand why she has to torture me with this rubbish box! This stupid box, makes enough noise to keep every hearing intact dog in the neighborhood awake! And she simply doesn't get it. I DON'T WANT TO WATCH TV! I just wish she'll stop stuffing my face infront of the tv and pretend that I'm some kinda moron going, see chewy, see! I don't want to see! Duh. Humans are so darn strange sometimes.

Anyway, yes. My blog is called chewonlife. 2 different meanings.

1. Chewy on Life.
Kinda like Yoda dispensing his little nuggets of wisdom, but of course, I'm much wiser and I've a lot more fur!
About the word, or rather, the name, Chewy, I gotta blog about that another time.

2. Chewy chewing on life.
Yes, chewing life into bits. Whining about life, musing about life. Ya know, that kinda airy fairy stuffy?

Oh, in case you don't quite know me (of course you don't! if you do, that's spooky!), I'm just a lazy fart of a dog. If I'm here, I'm here. If I'm not, I'm not. There you have it!